A shift toward emotional safety, growth, and resilience—without lowering standards
By Jane Kingsu-Cheng
There is a subtle shift happening in Filipino homes. The idea that parenting must be perfect is finally being questioned. As families juggle long work hours, digital stress, and the lingering pressure of tradition, many parents are starting to choose a different path—one that values emotional connection, authenticity, and growth over performance.
We asked experts to share their parenting forecast for 2026, as families move toward gentler discipline, healthier expectations, and prioritizing each other’s wellbeing—by setting their own standards and defining personal family values.
Dr. Alexander Jack Herrin
Parenting forecast #1: Emotional regulation becomes a core parenting skill
By Dr. Alexander Jack Herrin, developmental pediatrician
From clinical practice and everyday interactions with families, there is growing awareness among parents that discipline and guidance cannot come solely from authority, rules, or reaction. While traditional structures remain, many parents are beginning to recognize the value of pausing, listening, and responding thoughtfully rather than reacting from frustration or anger. This shift is not yet universal, but it reflects the direction parents are increasingly working towards.
Why this is happening: Parents today are influenced by multiple forces—exposure to different parenting styles within extended families, schools, peer groups, and online communities has opened conversations that rarely happened before, while greater access to information about child development, mental health, and the long-term impact of discipline styles has encouraged reflection. At the same time, emotional regulation does not mean abandoning respect or authority, but it reframes respect as mutual, showing that listening to a child’s perspective can strengthen boundaries and cooperation rather than weaken them.
What this means: When parents regulate their emotions, decision-making becomes clearer and fairer. Rules, consequences, and rewards are set with intention rather than anger, which reduces regret and inconsistency. Children who experience this approach learn that disagreements can be discussed and not silenced. They develop self-restraint, empathy, and the ability to communicate during conflict. Emotional regulation becomes a legacy passed down and refined through generations, allowing parents to guide rather than control, discipline without fear, and build relationships grounded in respect and trust.
Practical tips:
- Model first. Children learn emotional regulation by observing how adults speak, listen, and handle frustration.
- Pause before responding. Avoid setting rules or consequences while angry. Take time to cool down so decisions are made with a clear mind.
- Present a united front. Parents or caregivers should align privately before addressing a child, supporting each other’s decisions rather than contradicting them in front of the child.
- Approach, don’t barge in. Simple actions like knocking, speaking calmly, and asking questions show respect and de-escalate tension.
- Focus on discussion, not dominance. Emotional regulation is not about having the last word, but about having a meaningful conversation where both sides are heard.
Jose Raphael “Raph” G. Doval-Santos
Parenting forecast #2: Parents let go of “perfect parenting” and aim for “good enough.”
By Jose Raphael “Raph” G. Doval-Santos, clinical psychologist and psychotherapist
Across therapy sessions and lived experience, there is a growing recognition that perfect parenting is neither realistic nor healthy. Many parents—especially those juggling work, distance, migration, long commutes, or demanding professions—are beginning to admit that the idealized version of parenting they hold themselves to is impossible to sustain. Rather than aspiring to do everything flawlessly, parents are slowly confronting the shared reality that parenting is hard, imperfect, and human. This shift is not about lowering standards, but about redefining what success in parenting should be.
Why this is happening: Modern parenting expectations have risen dramatically. Beyond meeting basic needs, parents now feel pressure to be constantly present, emotionally attuned, academically supportive, and available for every milestone. These expectations assume time, resources, and flexibility that many families simply do not have. At the same time, many parents reflect on their own childhoods and recognize that their caregivers were also tired, overwhelmed, and imperfect. Seeing this across generations has fostered empathy rather than blame, and psychological theory supports this shift through ideas such as the “good enough parent,” which emphasizes that children need consistency and care, and not perfection.
What this means: Letting go of perfect parenting creates space for resilience to develop in both parents and children. When parents stop removing every obstacle from a child’s path, children learn how to cope with frustration, disappointment, and challenge. These are skills that build grit, flexibility, and problem-solving. Children also learn something powerful when parents admit mistakes: apologies, accountability, and repair model emotional maturity and humility. At its core, letting go of perfect parenting is an act of honesty as it allows parents to show up as real people and permits children to grow into resilient, capable individuals.
Practical tips:
- Practice self-compassion. Parents will lose patience, miss events, and fall short. Responding to these moments with kindness toward oneself—not shame—leads to better behavior and emotional health over time.
- Repair when you make mistakes. Saying “I’m sorry” to a child and explaining what went wrong teaches accountability, empathy, and emotional honesty. These moments can be deeply healing and transformative.
- Allow children to struggle safely. Not every problem needs to be solved for them. Age-appropriate challenges help children develop grit and internal resources.
- Ask for help when needed. Support does not have to come only from professionals—it can come from trusted family members, community leaders, or mentors. Some help is always better than none.
- Redefine success. A good parent is not one who removes all hardship, but one who provides love, support, and guidance through hardship.
Jun Angelo "AJ" Sunglao
Parenting forecast #3: Breaking the cycle becomes the default for young Filipino parents
By Jun Angelo "AJ" Sunglao, licensed psychologist, global mental health consultant, family therapist
Many parents now find themselves caught between the ghost of their own upbringing and the reality of what they know doesn’t work. For previous generations, parenting was an exercise in unquestioned authority—discipline was rooted in fear, shame, and silence, and emotional expression was seen as weakness. Today’s parents still carry those imprints, but they are no longer accepting them as the gold standard; they aren’t rejecting their parents, only the methods that left them emotionally constrained and psychologically hurt.
Why this is happening: This tension is unfolding in an environment with little margin for error. With high living costs, long work hours, and the constant hum of digital stress, the old fear-based model is exhausting to maintain, and it backfires by escalating conflict, pushing burnout, and building resentment. At the same time, parents are beginning to see that shame and hiya do not create discipline—only guardedness and reactivity.
What this means: Allowing children to express frustration without the threat of shame isn’t lax parenting. It builds emotional safety and helps children learn to regulate themselves. Parents who admit their own mistakes and focus on repair are not weakening their authority, they are building trust and predictability. This shift protects both parents and children from the heavy burden of perfection, helping families stay engaged, resilient, and emotionally healthy.
Practical tips:
- Seek professional support through therapy. Therapy is not only for those experiencing clinical conditions. It is a valuable, evidence-based space for understanding personal history, identifying patterns, and developing healthier emotional responses—especially for parents navigating intergenerational dynamics.
- Learn from evidence-based parenting resources. Research shows that many parents default to the methods they experienced growing up, even when those approaches are no longer considered developmentally sound. Today, parenting classes and expert-led programs—both locally and online—offer practical, science-backed guidance.
- Practice self-compassion during the process. Unlearning ingrained parenting behaviors while adopting healthier ones is cognitively and emotionally demanding. Experts emphasize the importance of pacing change, recognizing effort, and allowing growth to happen gradually rather than perfectly.
Monica L. Javier
Parenting forecast #4: Redefining school success
By Monica L. Javier, educational consultant and certified conscious parenting coach
While academic achievement still matters, more parents and schools now recognize that success cannot be measured by grades alone. Today, success also includes wellbeing, confidence, emotional regulation, and a child’s belief in their ability to grow.
Why this is happening: When success is defined too narrowly, children begin to associate learning with pressure, fear of mistakes, and comparison. We are already seeing the effects: burnout comes early, anxiety around schoolwork increases. Many learners hesitate to try unless they are sure they will succeed. Parents should consider this shift, because children learn and thrive when they feel safe, supported, and allowed to grow at a developmentally appropriate pace.
What this means: Redefining success does not mean lowering standards. Excellence still matters, but it should be rooted in growth rather than competition. True excellence looks like setting personal goals, persisting through challenges, learning from feedback, and striving to be better than you were before. When success includes wellbeing, children develop resilience without fear, understanding that mistakes are part of learning and effort matters. In homes and schools that nurture persistence and confidence, learners become motivated, grounded, and capable—driven by growth, not comparison, and carrying that mindset long after the grades are gone.
Practical tips:
- Talk about success as growth, effort, and progress, not just outcomes.
- Encourage children to set personal goals and reflect on improvement.
- Praise perseverance, strategies, and consistency.
- Remind children that success is not about being better than others, but about becoming better versions of themselves.
Kit Malvar-Llanes
Parenting forecast #5: Parenting is becoming more personalized and values-led
By Kit Malvar-Llanes, conscious parenting advocate, certified coach and facilitator
Filipino parents are moving away from a one-size-fits-all approach to parenting and becoming more intentional about choosing what works for their own children—while staying grounded in shared family values.
Why it’s happening: Parenting today requires a lot of balance between collective and inclusive. We recognize the importance of support from the “village,” but are also more discerning about which advice, methods, and schools of thought they adopt. With greater access to information and diverse parenting philosophies, families are learning to personalize their approach rather than follow trends blindly.
What this means: This shift allows parents to respond more closely to each child’s needs, temperament, and emotional development. While approaches may differ from one household to another, shared values and principles remain the glue that holds families together. Children benefit from feeling seen as individuals rather than being measured against rigid standards.
Practical tips:
- Parents can start by identifying their non-negotiable family values—respect, responsibility, empathy—then allow flexibility in how these are practiced.
- Seek support from the community when needed, but filter advice through what aligns with your child’s needs and your family’s principles.
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