And the magic of giving
AT A GLANCE
The mystery of Christmas filled our hearts. We understood little, but we sensed a great deal. —Ferrol Sams,Christmas Gift
Christmas isn’t simply a season of merrymaking. It is one big convolution. Even its history is unclear. Yuletide is believed to be rooted in several other significant occasions. Chief among them are the Winter Solstice, Saturnalia, and the Nativity of Jesus. The latter is the most common explanation for the Dec. 25 affair, especially since Christianity is one of the world’s predominant religions, with approximately 2.4 billion church members globally.
Needless to say, Christmas goes beyond religious undertakings. Neither is it just an excuse for gift-giving, cookie baking, shopping sprees, as well as brunches, lunches, and dinners with friends and family. The holiday is also a celebration of traditions, cultures, and—not often talked about—our emotions, which, if not celebrated, are at best examined, at worst indulged and consequently magnified, if not exaggerated.
Christmas in the Philippines, referred to in the vernacular as Pasko, from the Spanish word Pascua and the Latin word Pascha, which both translate to “Passover,” is unique in such a way that the holiday is commemorated for four months. It starts from September and lasts a few days past December, otherwise called the “Ber Months.” We are the only Catholic country that observes Christmas for this extended length.
Considering the state of the Philippines, a third-world nation, war-torn and oppressed by various colonizers over the past centuries, and geographically disaster-prone, found at the center of a typhoon belt and along boundaries of major tectonic plates, Christmas serves as a solace to us Filipinos who face extreme hardships almost all of the time.
Christmas serves as a good excuse for family and friends to gather, which in normal instances rarely ever happens because of the archipelagic nature of the Philippines and the busy schedules of everyone. The Christmas break allows us to take a breather from work and catch up with people we hold dear.
As a country of foodies, the Filipino Christmas feast or Noche Buena is the centerpiece of the celebrations. The dining table becomes as colorful as the handmade parols (ornamental lanterns) hanging outside each home, with a spread usually consisting of the lechon, crispy-skinned pit-roasted pig, which spells affluence; the sweet spaghetti meant for kids and not for your Italian friend; the kare-kare, a stew of oxtail, vegetables, and rich peanut sauce; crispy pata, deep fried pork leg to pair with beer; and the Filipino party staple, lumpia or spring rolls, adopted from the Chinese. Desserts are mostly rice-based like the puto bumbong, kakanin, biko, and bibingka, to name a few.
Suffice it to say, Filipinos find great pleasure in the biggest, longest festivity.
Past the cultural and traditional experience, how does Christmas feel? In the words of author and minister Charles Poole, “In gladness and sorrow, Christmas feels just like most other days, only more so.” It is not only our happiness that is heightened but all of our senses and emotions, including nostalgia, sadness, sorrow, frustrations, stress, and profound losses.
Some feel anxious over finalizing end-of-year projects, buying the right presents, planning for holiday meals, attending social commitments, and, in most cases in the Philippines, not having enough resources to celebrate Christmas at all.
What this entails is that we shouldn’t force ourselves or others to be happy at all costs. We also shouldn’t set ourselves up for disappointment by expecting that we will be able to feel something new or different altogether just because the “Christmas Spirit” is in the air. Each of us has distinct situations, experiences, and upbringing, which lead to our complex emotions.
Instead of dwelling on our negative feelings, however, exercise inward looking. Ruminate on your problems and view them in a different light. Take a short break to understand yourself and manage how you feel. The essence of Christmas lies in recognizing that, amid the winter’s deepest darkness and chill, our happiness should not be dictated by nature but by our mindset and actions.
At the risk of sounding preachy, I hope that those blessed with overabundance and joy this season, share what they can without imposing. Those who are troubled, meanwhile, should not be ashamed to ask for help, or at least be open about their issues and release pent-up feelings.
The heart of Yuletide, after all, is giving. Those who have enough attention, courage, and love should impart what they can to others, especially to those in need. If you feel like you have less, just count your blessings and express gratitude for the affection, health, and happiness you have received throughout the year, no matter how little or lacking they might seem. This philosophy does not only apply to Christmas but every waking moment of our lives.
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